The Broken Telegraph

Photo credit: FailBlog.org

by Ian Ebright

I am interested in people who have achieved great things, but not on their own terms, and in a field that was never their original intent. I’m sure you’ve read about examples of this. Devastating failure often precedes greatness for those brave enough to change the course of their life. I’ve read some heroic examples of this recently and it’s got me thinking.

Greg Mortenson is one such person. An avid mountain climber and all-around athlete, Mortenson has reached several high-altitude peaks on as many continents. He was ready to give K2 a try: a mountain located on the China/Pakistan border and more importantly regarded by climbers as one of the world’s most challenging (it is the second highest peak on Earth; only Everest reaches higher. And if any of you correct me by stating that one of the volcanoes on Hawaii are actually taller if you factor in the portion beneath the surface of the ocean, I will ban you for being annoying).

Mortenson was doing fine as he made his way towards the summit, but another climber’s grave illness forced a team of four honorable guys to carry the sick one back down to safety. Mortenson was one of them. And by the time they reached help, his body was completely spent. K2 would have to wait for another time in the future. From there, Mortenson wandered, depleted and disoriented, through glaciers and peaks, having completely dislocated himself from the actual way back: he was lost, and witness to his eroding health. Mortenson’s biography describes it for us: “Drifting in and out of consciousness to a groaning soundtrack of the glacier’s mysterious inner machinery, he made his peace with his failure…It was his body that had failed, he decided, not his spirit, and every body had its limits. He, for the first time in his life, had found the absolute limit of his.”

Mortenson eventually found civilization in the loosest sense of the word- a small, poor village in the mountains- although it wasn’t anywhere near the town he was trying to reach. But something happened to his perspective while he recovered on the floor of the town mentor’s living area. He saw the great need to educate and assist the children of Pakistan’s upper region, and his life-long passion for climbing began to fade into the background. From there, and after a series of obstacles, Mortenson went on to build 55 schools in the area of the Taliban’s origin. I haven’t finished the book yet but I believe he’s still at work in that region today, doing more of the same.

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Now clearly that’s a remarkable example of a person doing a 180, but it demonstrates something universal. People seem to find success and joy  when they roll with life instead of fighting against it. Of course, success can be weighed any number of ways, but the point is- those who are stubborn might achieve what they’re after, but does it come with any lasting satisfaction? While there are many examples of success by surprise and also by persistence- I find that I often hear of hollowness and dread in those who fought at any cost to get to the big time.

In America, we like to call that ambition, and the word has such a deceptive nobility to it. As long as there are athletes in nice suits being interviewed by Bryant Gumbel, and taking sips of water in between questions in an attempt to appear introspective, then it’s easier for the rest of us to assume that reaching the top is worth any sacrifice. But if we lose a grasp on ourselves, our families and friends- how then is any victory a success? What’s the use of friendships, family and most importantly a spouse or children, if one pushes those things into a small space while giving the bulk of life over to untamed ambition? And how severe is the spasm for those who believe that they MUST succeed, and yet find failure?

Are you able to look around when you land in a pit? Is it a time of honest personal assessment or just a never-ending stretch of resentment and anger? I struggle to do what’s healthy when I fail but it’s something I pray and work towards so that I can learn from, and utilize this inevitable component of life. Our culture has taught us to blame everything from parents to bosses to classism, and as a result this nation kicks and screams when life doesn’t progress on optimal terms. If you think I’m generalizing, just take a look at the news. What we see glorified in our tabloid media is a type of lifestyle that rationalizes or medicates when things aren’t at their peak. Part of the problem of this Myspace generation is that so many are trying to position and market themselves. Everyone wants to be a brand. This never-ending parade of desperation seems to be caught in the spin-cycle. Some people have managed to completely redefine, and use friendships only for networking potential. What a dead end.

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I get an encouraging gut check every time I read examples of people adapting under pressure. It is so much more meaningful than those resistent types who just keep ramming their heads against a wall in the hopes of breaking through.  

As I like to do, I want to qualify my point: first of all- some fights are worth the punishment. That makes this whole conversation very subjective and I accept that. This has to be a personal examination, because it’s a very difficult thing to determine for others if their fight, or dream, or goal- is futile or worthwhile. And of course we encounter negative influences and obstacles and I don’t expect that anyone should ignore or minimize that. What seems healthier to me is a perspective that accepts the hurdles and identifies them clearly, but uses these things as leverage or at least as a learning experience. Otherwise, we’re sitting in a bog of regret, and that not only keeps us from getting anywhere but it builds a heart that’s hard and full of resentment. In that way, we aren’t getting back at anyone or anything that may have kept us from the so-called prize. What we’re actually doing is turning off.

Now to make these questions even more personal: have you lost yourself in the pursuit of greatness? It’s a fair question to a nation full of ambitious people, and it’s one that I ask myself frequently. Are you able to look around at the contents of your life and find what’s failed? From there, are you willing to admit when your reoccurring attempts aren’t working? And most importantly- are you willing to change course- which means adapting your behavior, and not just adopting new words?

There is something very powerful and at the same time very difficult about allowing one’s life to be an improvisation. It’s not sexy like the rigidly ambitious (plus- those people always seem to have the cooler sunglasses), but the rewards will likely be far more substantial. And since failure is a normal part of life, we’d be wise to bring along a few things on the journey, like passion, flexibility and reflection.